Motherhood, Careers, and Wellness: A Balancing Act

Time to Reframe Our Mindset!

Hello again, amazing mamas! Today, we’re tackling a topic that’s both incredibly important and often a source of major stress: balancing self-care with the demands of motherhood and a career. If you’ve ever felt like you’re juggling a thousand balls and barely keeping any of them in the air, you’re not alone. But guess what? It doesn’t have to be this way. Let's start thinking of balancing rather than juggling. 

The Myth of the Perfect Mom

First things first, let’s bust a major myth: the perfect mom who does it all, effortlessly balancing work, home, kids, and self-care, without ever breaking a sweat? She does not exist. That’s right, she’s a figment of our collective imagination (and maybe a product of some very unrealistic Instagram posts). The truth is, we’re all just doing the best we can.

Reframing Self-Care: It’s Not Selfish, It’s Essential

One of the biggest hurdles to self-care is the guilt. We’re conditioned to believe that taking time for ourselves is selfish. But it’s all about attitude. You can have an attitude of selfishness and it will be selfish. Or you can approach your self care with an attitude of love, gratefulness, and self-respect. In doing so, you will be an excellent example of honoring yourself and setting boundaries. Because the reality is that you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself is not only essential for your own well-being but also for the well-being of your family. When you’re healthy, happy, and energized, you’re in a much better position to take care of everyone else.

Strategies for Balancing Self-Care with Motherhood and Career

Let’s dive into some practical strategies to help you find that elusive balance. Remember, it’s all about finding what works for you and being flexible.

1. Schedule Self-Care: Just like you schedule meetings and playdates, schedule time for self-care. Even better if it is something consistent. This way, everyone knows what to expect. Whether it’s a workout, a bubble bath, or just 10 minutes of quiet time, put it on your calendar and treat it like any other important appointment. It can be helpful if it is the same time every day or every week, and then you know you have that time set aside to pencil in whatever it is you need for that day or week.

2. Delegate and Share the Load: You don’t have to do it all. You might be the only one in the house who thinks of it all, but that does not make it entirely your responsibility. Delegate tasks at home and work whenever possible. Share responsibilities with your partner, hire help if you can afford it, or enlist older kids to pitch in with chores, and younger kids with whatever they are capable of. One of the best mindset shifts I have done with this is to be aware of how I am asking for help.

   For example, it is not asking every night “can you help me out and do the dishes.” It is establishing a system ahead of time and as part of your routine with a conversation such as “It overwhelms and frustrates me to cook and do the the dishes. I feel like I am stuck in the kitchen and miss out on the whole evening. What if I cook and you manage the dishes?”

3. Set Boundaries: This is a big one. Set clear boundaries between work and home life. When you’re working, focus on work. When you’re home, focus on your family. If you work from home, set specific work hours and only work within that time frame. Similarly, when it’s time for self-care, protect that time fiercely.

4. Incorporate Self-Care into Your Routine: Find ways to incorporate self-care into your daily routine. Maybe it’s doing a quick (like 2-5 minute) meditation before the kids wake up, taking a walk during your lunch break, or listening to your favorite podcast while cooking dinner.

5. Let Go of Perfection: Accept that things won’t always go according to plan, and that’s okay. Some days will be chaotic, and you might not get everything done. Let go of the need for perfection and focus on doing your best. That might mean cereal for dinner while you get in a quick-15 min work out.

6. Create a Support Network: Surround yourself with a support network of friends, family, and other moms who understand what you’re going through. Lean on each other for support, advice, and encouragement.

Real-Life Tips

Here are some creative ways that either myself or one of my clients has used to balance self-care with our busy lives:

• A 10-minute yoga session every morning before the kids wake up. It’s quick, easy, and sets a positive tone for the entire day. Plus stretching first thing in the morning is sooo good for your body.
• Ask for help. Utilize friends or family to watch the kids one night a week so you can grab dinner with a friend, run errands, or just be at home.
• Keep a gratitude journal. Every night, write down three things you’re grateful for. This will help you focus on the positive and feel more balanced. And wake up in a better mood, too.

The Bottom Line: Self-Care is Non-Negotiable

At the end of the day, self-care is non-negotiable. It’s not a luxury; it’s a necessity. And it’s okay to prioritize yourself. By taking care of yourself, you’re not only improving your own well-being but also setting a powerful example for your kids. They learn from you, and by seeing you prioritize your health and happiness, they’ll understand the importance of self-care and self-respect in their own lives.

Looking Ahead

In our next post, we’ll dive into the concept of generational health and how moms can lead the way to a healthier future. We’ll explore how your health choices today can impact not just you, but your children and even future generations.

Join the Conversation

I’d love to hear from you! How do you balance self-care with the demands of motherhood and a career? Share your tips, struggles, and successes with me on Instagram @rethinkwellness_w_jeni.

Until next time, here’s to thriving, not just surviving!

Jeni Steger, PA-C